One of the most important and common topics that people will encounter when helping to pay for or manage their senior parents’ care or living arrangements is power of attorney. As we’ve covered before on the blog, there are many different types of power of attorney arrangements. While these resources give a good sense of the mechanics of power of attorney, another incredibly important aspect of power of attorney for your senior parents is how best to discuss power of attorney as a family. Power of attorney can be a very emotional thing for a senior parent to discuss as they may view it as giving up part of their autonomy. However, power of attorney is an incredibly powerful and useful tool that allows senior parents to make sure that their future care and living arrangements are managed by individuals they love and trust, and according to their wishes that they made when they were of sound mind. By focusing on all the positive aspects of power of attorney, you can have a more productive and happy conversation with your senior parent. Use some of these tips on how to talk to your senior parents about power of attorney. 

Start the conversation early

One of our favorite tips for having a discussion about anything having to do with aging and your loved one’s care, whether it’s related to power of attorney or not, is to discuss these things with your loved ones before you have to discuss these things. By discussing power of attorney early on, you can avoid the stress and pressure of having to make decisions quickly such as if your parent suddenly becomes incapacitated due to something like a medical emergency.

This allows your parent to make this important decision regarding their living and their care while they are still fully in charge of their faculties, meaning that you and your loved one can feel confident that you are fully respecting their wishes and implementing their chosen plan.

Show your love and concern

Another tip we constantly hear about discussing power of attorney with your loved one is to make sure that they know that the reason you want to discuss power of attorney is because you care deeply about their wellbeing. Signing a power of attorney document can feel like a loss of autonomy for an older adult, and it’s important to remind that them the reason you want to discuss power of attorney is because you want to do what's best for them and their well-being.

It is important to communicate that your main goal is to ensure their well-being and respect their wishes, while also making sure they have someone they trust to take care of them if they become unable to do so. 

Use clear and simple language

Power of attorney can be a complex and confusing topic, so it's important to explain it in a way that your senior parent can understand and process. Like many other legal processes, setting up and understanding power of attorney can involve a lot of legal terms such as agent and proxy. When you’re discussing power of attorney with your senior parent, make sure to use plain language and to avoid legal jargon wherever possible. If it’s easier or important to use a legal term, make sure you understand it yourself and are able to explain it to someone else. It can often be helpful to explain the process to a friend or colleague before discussing it with your senior parent, to make sure you can easily and clearly answer any questions they might have.

Emphasize they’re planning for their future

One thing that can help frame the power of attorney conversation in a positive and helpful light is to focus on all the benefits that come with power of attorney.

The most prominent benefit of power of attorney is that it can make sure that your parents are able to fully shape how they want their future care and living arrangements to be managed. Explain that having power of attorney in place can help ensure that their current wishes are respected in the future and that someone they trust is making decisions on their behalf if they become unable to do so. 

Respect your senior parent’s autonomy

It’s very important to keep in mind that the whole point of power of attorney is to enshrine, and then enact, your senior parents’ wishes for their future care. Remembering all that is at stake for your parent when they are deciding on whether or not to grant someone power of attorney - and if they do, what the parameters of that power of attorney are - can help you keep what is most important about the power of attorney conversation in full focus: your senior parent’s wishes. Also keep in mind that because this can be such a large conversation, it might need to occur over many installments as your parents think about what they truly want for their own future. Make sure to give your senior parents support, but also space, as they make these important decisions. 

Seek professional advice

There are several types of professional that you can turn to when you want to discuss power of attorney with your senior parent. An elder law attorney or other legal professional can help guide the conversation by answering any legal questions, and ensuring that your parent's rights are protected by properly executing and drafting all required documents. A caregiver or health professional might have more insight into the types of care that might be required for a senior, while a therapist or counselor might have tips on how best to approach a potentially tricky topic like power of attorney.  

There are many different types of power of attorney arrangements that may be appropriate for a senior parent, and it’s always important to discuss something as important as power of attorney with a legal or elder are professional. Each type of power of attorney arrangement has its own pros and cons, as well as its own particular legal requirements and boundaries. But because all power of attorney arrangements involve an individual looking after and handling the interests of another, which can be an incredibly sensitive issue, make sure to discuss power of attorney as a family well before you need to make any decisions or sign any documents.

To learn more about how Sunbound can help make senior living more affordable for you or your loved one, send us an email at info@sunboundhomes.com or request more information on Sunbound. Sunbound is the best way to pay for senior living and is on a mission to make senior living affordable for everyone.